A few months ago, I wrote a blog about my problems with the film version of WICKED as a continuing pattern where as a proviso of Elphaba being misunderstood as simply evil, we are given insight not just into her unfortunate physical difference (she’s green) and the burden it places on her childhood, but into the corrupt nature of the powers that be in charge of the world. As we finish the fairy tale movie (which is just part I) and the lead-in to the eventual Frank Baum story THE WIZARD OF OZ, we are rooting for Elphaba to dismantle society as it stands and find her rightful place as a moral leader.
I wrote how tiring it had become that the actions of evil characters seemingly are given a pass the last few decades as long as their awful background justifies their actions. Rarely though, do they have to take account of the results of those actions. Sans a few movies like Dead Man Walking, more movies that focus on those that have psychopathy are like The Joker, leaving the evil protagonist with little consequence for stepping beyond the boundaries of morality.
Enter the film IT ENDS WITH US starring Director Justin Baldoni and Blake Lively.
(WARNING: Spoilers below) — The movie covers the characters of Lily Bloom and Ryle Kincaid, both of tragic life histories, when they find themselves together reluctantly in a relationship. When Lily finds that her first love, Atlas Corrigan, owns a restaurant in town, we learn their backstory as well and learn more about Lily’s father, whose funeral Lily attends in the movie’s opening scene. Everything is connected, including the fact that Lily’s abusive father nearly beat Atlas to death when he found the two teens in bed together. After that, Atlas had disappeared. Now back int the present, Ryle cannot handle Lily’s remaining affinity for Atlas and becomes abusive himself. That abuse has real consequences, not so much legally for Ryle, but after Lily learns she’s pregnant, with Kyle’s sister Alyssa adding support, she rebuffs Ryle, finally stepping away from the abusive cycle that has become entwined in her dating leitmotif.
Unfortunately, this film had issues before it was even released. Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni’s friendship deteriorated into accusations of actual sexual harassment, and both sides lawyered up in an attempt to discredit the other person’s character, causing damage not just to each other’s images but to movie itself. Critics and organizations alike were worried the topic of domestic abuse was being addressed in a very slipshod manner, especially after Blake Lively seemed a little too blase’ during the press tour.
I stumbled upon the film quite a while ago when I was sick one day and watched it, unaware of much that had gone on off camera. I have to tell you, I would like more movies to be as raw and real about topics such as these as this one. What you might think of Baldoni and Lively post movie slander campaigns is one issue, but their performances were very strong. Lively, like her name is energetic, if not a little unsure and hesitant. Baldoni, who also directed the film, is eager and aggressive, almost to the point of discomfort at times as he straddles that line of acceptable behavior and inappropriate/awkward.
It’s a little ironic for me after seeing this film to read how much the critics were worried about the little things like why the secondary characters lacked depth and what music might be involved and by what artists (I suppose for these folks you can’t use Taylor Swift in a film that is serious because she’s just too poppy). Yet many were aligned that when it came to the topic of the picture, the heavy-handedness worked so well it was uncomfortable watching it. And that’s what it should be.
Critics and audience members such as myself often will look at certain mega-budget films and criticize it for going too far and stretching the lines of credulity. Often we try to bring those films back to earth even though they are created to be entertaining more than anything else. Funny when we do get the smaller film investigating real life scenarios that causes us disturbing feelings, we want find all the incorrect behaviors in acting or directing choice to verify that it feels untrue because we’d do things better. I mean why doesn’t Lily’s character just call the police?
Simple enough, right. But then maybe you should examine the past statistics of how the police and society at large have treated women who were violated by their own husbands or boyfriends and you’ll recall the reason why these things often go unreported. Or maybe you’ll pause to consider that not only is this abuser the father to her child, but the brother to her best friend. Does it matter that we don’t learn of Alyssa’s outside interests or who her other friends are? For this viewer, it did not. Sure, it was a bit odd that Ryle’s sister happens to stumble into Lily’s flower shop looking for a job shortly after Lily meets Ryle, but weirder coincidences have happened in my life then this one. While obviously convenient, it isn’t the worst film infraction I’ve come upon.
How many times have we heard a report that police showed up over the weekend at a celebrity couple’s house for a ‘domestic violence’ dispute only to find later no charges were actually filed? If anything, the ending of IT ENDS WITH US feels terrible because this is how things are, with a further caveat that often, many women return to the abusive relationship. A pregnant woman carrying a baby to term has a forever connection to the father through that child, and it can’t be wished away by putting him in jail or reporting him to authorities because that’s what he deserves. Feelings are complex as well as shameful I’d imagine when you realize the man you love(d) is an abuser.
As the movie makes abundantly clear, domestic violence begets more domestic violence, a chain that become psychology embedded within the victims such that they often become their own perpetrators. It’s a very hard rap to shake.
It Ends With Us is not a pleasant movie to watch, nor should it be. When you consider the kind of fare we are often subjected to, the glorification of rebellion against society culminating in violence to achieve a just goal, It Ends With Us, while not perfect, delivers the kind of gritty discomfort and uncomfortable relationship choices many will understand, even if they have never had it sink into the abyss of actual physical abuse.
I enjoyed the film for what it was attempting to do and felt the deep conflicts within myself justifying how we as a society like to paint other people with standard brush colors of black and white, only to find that when it comes to our own life’s situations we expect others to consider so many other colors. The film saturated me for the next few days with the dirtiness of life’s truly hard decisions and the fact there are often no movie quick-fixes.
IT ENDS WITH US is rated PG-13 for adult themes and violence and is available on Netflix.
Feel free to share your thoughts once you see the movie.
UPDATE ON THE LAWSUITS OF BALDONI/LIVELY - Read the NY TIMES Opinion Piece from July 7 here.